Mi Mi Mi... Miao!

So Vixen tagged me. With a meme about goals. I'm uposta list mine.
And here goes:

I’ve never been a goal oriented person. I’m not sure if that was born or bred in me. For the first 27 years of my life, I was a military dependent. My life was not at all my own. I just went where the orders took me. I realize this doesn’t mean you have to have NO goals. I mean, there is such a thing as personal goals. But I’ve just never consciously set any.

Just for fun (and for the lovely Vixen), I will do my best to feebly present something akin to a rendering of my goals.

I remember deciding early on not to let fear and anxiety be the boss of me. This intent was challenged in a big way(no pun intended)when I became pregnant with my first child. I was suddenly FILLED with fear. I had a little life inside of me that I may not be able to protect. I had always felt confident about protecting myself, but knew I had little ability to protect my loved ones. It’s been a long and constant journey overcoming that fear and not letting it rule my choices and actions. I have never been comfortable in new situations, but the course of my life was set to present me with consistently new things, on a rather large scale. Always moving to a new place. Spending much of my time just getting my bearings. Planting roots, just to have them pulled up and broken to pieces. So I learned that the roots are not in the places. They are in the heart. And in the family. I have poured my entire being into those things. Then I married a military man who plucked me up again, only this time, he wanted to alienate me from the family wherein my roots lie. He loved the fact that I was a nurturing, lively thing, but he wanted to plant me in the middle of his living room and tell me to grow. Unfortunately, for him, the old roots he despised were too strong and he couldn’t break them. He wanted me to learn to be independent and it worked! I stopped needing him!

So here I am today. Many years later and again, living in a new place (only this time, all the choices are MINE.)

Several years ago, I started swimming every morning. I happened to live in a situation which allowed me the luxury of swimming in a private, heated, saltwater pool every day. I fell in love with the warmth and energy and tranquility that this provided. I vowed to swim every day as long as I live (well not EVERY day, but pretty much). Of course, I’ve moved around a lot and had to find a new place to swim, and since the swimming pools are not on my doorstep (as that first one was), I’ve gone through some dry spells. My body and spirit do not like these dry spells, but c’est la vie! Can’t be helped. Again, anxiety wants to take hold of me and keep me from trying a new health club. Today, I had to overcome it again. But once I was surrounded by the loving water, anxiety melted away. (As we all know, it’s the first time that is the hardest.) So you could say that a goal of mine is to be healthy, in mind, body and spirit. In fact, that is THE goal of mine. And I spend as much time as I can in helping others to follow the same path. I would say “help others to accomplish it,” but I feel it is not something to be accomplished but more something to live in.

Honestly, I just go where the wind blows me. But not just any wind. The one that has my name on it.

Oh, and my other goal is to never get married again. :)

7 comments:

Whiskeymarie said...

Nice post. I always worry about setting too many goals- it always seems to be disappointing when they're not all met, or not met the way you thought they would be.
I like the "free spirit" best as well.

Vixen said...

I love your post...it's so YOU! Thanks for doing this, and I love the way that you have learned from your life and past.

thethinker said...

I wish I could be dedicated to a routine, even something like swimming everyday.

Anonymous said...

good stuff....I know not what else to say

Brillig said...

I love how your threw that last sentence in there. hahahaha.

JR's Thumbprints said...

Marriage should only happen once anyway. Or twice. Or thrice. Or ... hell, there your goals.

Anonymous said...

I just farted