Pieces of Eight

A bad, bad boy rag-ama-tagged me. He knows better, too. :) But was so sweet of him to think of me, so I’m gonna let him get away with it. HOWEVER, rebel that I am, I shan’t be passing the tag on. So I assume that causes me to remain IT.

Eight Random/Idiotic Facts About Me Me Me:

Un) I’m obsessed with pens. So much so that, when I see someone writing with what looks like a smooth writing instrument, I want to snatch it out of their hands! I hate pencils and will only write with a pencil under great duress. I will write with a strawberry before I will write with a pencil!

Deux) If my bra and panties don’t match, I am quite put off. This is why I usually only buy white or black. Recently, I was forced to buy several colors because my favorite brand is now discontinued. (This always happens to me.) So you can now see why I’ve been put off a lot lately. It really pisses me off, too, that when I buy a bra from Victoria’s Secret, they rarely have panties to match. I fuckin’ hate that. It should be against the law. They have stupid panties anyway.

Trois) I hate chewing gum. If you ever see me chewing gum, it is probably because it’s some kind of bubble gum that I can’t resist putting in my mouth, but I almost immediately remove it because I hate how gum feels after it’s begun being chewed. And I think people can look really, really stupid if they are chewing gum and have been guilty of actually judging people based on that fact alone. Obviously, I don’t judge everyone that way, because almost every single person I know and love chews gum and offers it to me constantly and have never figured out that I hate gum, even though I always say “no” and sometimes even add, “I don’t chew gum.” Hehehe. I can relate to this, though. Because my sister has plainly stated that she hates coffee for years, but we still offer it to her.

Quatre) Even though I am the epitome of femininity in my style, I don’t wear earrings. In fact, I own a very small amount of jewelry. And what I do own is good jewelry. I am normally only wearing one bracelet and that’s it. A few men have purchased jewelry for me, one of them an engagement ring. He asked what I wanted and I said I didn’t care, as long as it was real and he picked it out. A male friend of mine once asked if I thought a woman would mind if, instead of a genuine tiny diamond, he bought her a very large and dazzling cz. I replied, “I don’t know, would you rather have a dazzling, fake woman or a simple, genuine one?”

Cinq) I wear my fingernails very, very short, with clear polish. I started doing this when I had small babies at home and found myself accidentally scratching them when changing their diapers. When they got older, I tried to start wearing longer nails again, but everyone I knew kept having babies, and so I’ve kept them short. Now I keep them short because when I give my boyfriend backrubs, I like to not give him puncture wounds in his flesh! (And my toenails are ALWAYS painted pink.)

Six) I would pay ten dollars per gallon for gas if they would pump it for me at the station.

Sept) You will never hear me say that I’m on a diet.

Huit) I don’t believe in the word, “please.” If you do see/hear me use it, it’s usually just for dramatic effect.

Speaking of babies…

A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankrolls smaller, homes happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten and the future worth living for.


Dan said...

They have stupid panties anyway.

Now if I can only convince the models in their catalogs to get rid of them!

Brillig said...

1. okay, you have a thing for pens. Weird, but interesting.
2. I'm wearing a pink bra and white unders. Can we still be friends?
3. I'm chomping some gum right now--and yes, I look like a camel chewing its cud. Charming.
4. Love the "simple, genuine" bit.
5. The worst is when you get poop from the diapers stuck under your long finger nails. Sigh.
6. Move to Oregon, where they ONLY have service pumps.
7. eat, lady.
8. I almost never comment on meme's. I must have liked this one or something.

Rebecca said...

I hate pumping petrol too - specially in winter! And if I ever happen to be wearing matching bra and undies it's a definite FLUKE!

cathouse teri said...

Dan: My point exactly! Those panties look good on models and mannequins! We can't all have a nice ass like yours, babe!

Brill: I'm wearing a pink bra, too! But my undies are invisible. I'm doing laundry. All of it. ;)

Rebecca: Yes, when it's super hot or super cold and snowy, or raining... I would LOVE someone to pump that damn fuel into my vehicle! I would pay cash money!

BBC said...

I'm obsessed with finding my spiritual soul mate, that one woman in a billion that can look into my eyes and hold my hand as I caress her and we have spiritual sex with each other.

Haven't found her, but I will keep looking.

Anonymous said...

I too love pens. I've spent countless hours culling for the perfect pen. I've had to force myself to get rid of them because I had hundreds. I don't wear bra's and panties that match because matching sets cost too much. If they discontinue your bra, you should look for it on ebay. That is where I find things I love. I agree about saying I'm on a diet, I never eat low fat foods on purpose. Oregon sucks, dont move there

Silver Dragon said...

Un) The word just before the period is missing an 'i'

Deux) If you were a man, then you'd only need one piece of underwear

Trois) Chewing gum is not so bad, but I do agree that you can judge a person based solely on that. I once saw a girl who had this annoying ability to pop non-bubble gum whilst chewing it, and I thought to myself "What a slut!" I later found out that I was quite correct.

Quatre) I don't wear earrings either, albeit for other reasons (such as my masculinity).

Cinq) same as for quatre

Six) Your suggestion is quite correct as it would prevent situations such as THIS
from arising.

Sept) A fat joke here would be rather inappropriate, but my mischievous side has overcome my desire to have my comment not deleted. Anyway, here goes;

Teri Said: You will never hear me say that I’m on a diet.

Me sez: Oh, so your Mom did teach you not to speak while your mouth is full. Glad to see that you have manners.

Huit) I guess I was wrong about the manners part earlier.

jennifer said...

Matching bra and panties! I thought those only existed on tv!

cathouse teri said...

bbc: Good luck with that.

Ba Doozie: Yes, I did shop on ebay, which is where I found slim pickins and had to settle for what colors were available. *Teri takes notes: never move to Oregon*

Monsieur Dragon: Love the "i" comment. "I thought you were done." Is that something you say a lot to women?

Jennifer: You mean tv isn't real?

Adventures In Waitressing said...

I am now quite sure which was funnier. The blog or the responses. I am laughing so loud I am in danger of waking the children. But since I too can't resist.. here is mine..

One) I am a waitress, therefore I too am obsessed with pens. I pitch a fit when a guest steals one of mine. But I do have an amazing pen that a friend of mine from Greece sent me. You would love to get your hands on it.

Two) I hate when my bra and panties don't match as well, but I am resigned to it. I have enough difficulty just finding a bra big enough, that I stopped worrying about matching panties.

Three) I am in the middle. I like to chew it long enough for the taste and to freshen my breath, then out it goes. There are other things I "prefer" to have in my mouth.

Four) I own tons of jewelry, but all anyone ever sees me wear is a silver necklace. The last gift I recieved from my grandmother before she died. It NEVER comes off.

Five) My fingernails are long and natural. I don't pay for them anymore. But sometimes I want to cut them off. Because something is constantly trying to get underthem.

Six) I will except your ten dollars. I hate gas prices and pumping gas in the winter is a bitch. But if ya all want. I will pump your gas for money. I am a greedy bitch LOL

Seven) It goes without saying for me. If I was on a diet, my ass wouldn't be this ghetto.

Eight) Amazed. Speechless. But.. more power to you. Glad you are remaining true to you!!

Silver Dragon said...

@ Teri; You said: "I thought you were done." Is that something you say a lot to women?

Sorry babe, I'm not sure if it is the Heineken in me, or my recurrent doltishness, but that comment went way over my head.

cathouse teri said...

I'm just gonna leave that one alone. ;)

Gunfighter said...

Sorry, Teri... I won't do it agian... probably.

I just wantesd to know more about you, my dear.


Keshi said...

**If my bra and panties don’t match, I am quite put off

that is soo me too!


Gina said...

First visit...you are a riot!

The thing with the pens? INTERESTING. There is a client who visits our adult day regularly who is OBSESSED with pens.Hoards them. She WILL snatch them, not out of your hand, but if they are left around, they are history. She carriess as many on her person as possible with other novelty items that are unloaded into a bag at the door. For her, Pens are like money, earnings for being 'good'. We don't reward her this way, but were instructed by her group home caregivers to take them away if she is not 'good'. I could never do that, as she is one touch mofo ...

do you have these tendancies?

Jami said...

I don't really care about pens as long as I have one that works when I need to write something.

Bra and panties - Got a bunch of colors of both and tend to grab ones that look OK together but may not necessarily MATCH.

I chew gum - preferably bubble - but not often.

Not a lot of jewelry, but what there is, is all real. My ears aren't pierced so there are very few times I wear earrings, either.

Short nails because I spend a lot of time using a keyboard every day, and while I CAN type just fine with long nails, I type a lot faster without 'em.

I pump gas. (I also have gas sometimes, but that's not the issue.)

Diet? That's whatever you eat, right?

I say "Please" when it's appropriate. I'm the only one who gets to determine when it's appropriate, though.

Jenn in Holland said...

I will write with a strawberry before I will write with a pencil!

Funniest. Line. Ever.

I was quite fond of many others as well, but that's my fave.

Jenn in Holland said...

Oh, yes, and I am obsessed with that baby.

zog said...

Re: Pens, and your obsession therewith. You're not alone.


The Exception said...

I loved your comment to the guy about the jewelry. I only wear the "real" thing when I wear anything at all. A girl I work with married last year. Her choice for everything was small but high quality - I would rather have quality over quantity any day of the week.

Worker Mommy said...

Who doesn't like pen.

Yeah, with you on the nail think to. I used to get acrylics because mine do not want to grow...but then stopped when I had kids.
I've gotten them once since then but then it messes w/my typing speed.
And we just can't have that can we, especially when I'm trying to blog during work.

Worker Mommy said...

Ok, something about your blog suddenly renders me unable to type...
I'm sure you get what I was trying to say there (even w/the typos)

soccer mom in denial said...

I hate meme's too. I think we were on the same someone's list. At least I was in good company.

Short fingernails? I love you.

And move to New Jersey - state law that gas has to be pumped for you.

I never, ever diet either. I love my rolls - I earned them giving birth to three kids.

cathouse teri said...

Okay, here I go again. I did many of these responses this morning, but they fuckin didn't take! Fuck!

Adventurous One: I'm glad we could make you laugh. Laughter truly is the best medicine. And what the hell size of bra do you wear that you can't find one?? They come in humongo sizes now and they're pretty!

Guntotger: As bad a boy as you are, I wasn't speaking of you. Unless you tagged me, too and I didn't know it! (So many hands on me at one time, can't keep track! God damn taggers!)

Keshi: I know! It's so yucky to be unmatched under my clothes!

Gina: Welcome! I'm glad you like us! Actually, so far I've been able to resist snatching and/or stealing. (hehehe.. I said snatch)

Purty Jami: I think 'please' is rarely appropriate. I caught myself telling my children that please is not a begging word and then realized... hey, it is! And I have no intention of begging for anything!

Lovely Jenn: Isn't she a beauty!

ZogMama: So true. Many, many people love their pens. :)

Exceptional One: Amen to that, sistah!

Worker Mommy: Typing is no fun with long nails!

Soccer Mom: I always say, "It took me a long time to develop this full figure! I ain't givin it up now!"

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

Awww... I love what you said about babies...
true so true.

I also like your response to the guy asking about a simple diamond.

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

Oh, I also meant to say..
I haven't had long nails since Matthew was born.... much easier.

Adventures In Waitressing said...

Well had to answer your question Teri.. I wear a 42 ddd and it is either a popular size and other ladies are snatching it up before I can buy it. . .or the really cute ones don't they don't have in my size.

cathouse teri said...

Holy shit! I need to see a picture of those! :)

Ms. Annie D said...

Chewing gum.

I never put the stuff in my mouth, and don't want to watch someone else working a piece.

In fact, I'd kick a man out of bed - permanently - if he chewed gum!

Diesel said...

Hell, I'll pump your gas for that kind of cash. Where do you live?

cathouse teri said...

I live veri veri close to you!

Adventures In Waitressing said...

Laughing my ass off at your response Teri. I might just have to comply with the picture.. LOL